dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
