i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
My feet surprised me
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
