so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
