did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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