Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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