ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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