it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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