Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize