I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
There r osticjed everywhere
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
