I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
