why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize
