Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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