How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
