That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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