Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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