So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
The Olympian is in my bed
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
