hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
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