She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I touched a dick in church today
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
