How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
