We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
