Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize