I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
