What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
