Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
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