So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
