It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
