Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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