in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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