Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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