Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
