there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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