butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I can text with my tongue
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize