when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
