:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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