I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
