Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
