umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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