OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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