discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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