he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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