Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
