they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
