oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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