i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
