make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
