I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
