what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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