would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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