She announced her abortion via fbk
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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