True but thats because hes a fetus.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I licked your asshole in confidence.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize